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Dear Chico State…your video from Summer Bridge

All the Revisions \0/

All the Revisions \0/

Kim Jaxon

English 130P

Professor Jaxon

25 April 2018

On Revision: Suggestions for Playful Prose

“Half my life is an act of revision.” –John Irving

Each semester, I ask students to revise their papers. It is now your turn. I want you to experience what it feels like to have a complete draft in front of you that you can now play with. When it comes to revision in my own writing, I often throw out whole paragraphs, add new introductions and conclusions, add a source, or take the one paragraph that is working at the end and start over. The revision work is a major overhaul. I am asking you to think about 1-2 places in your drafts that might work better with a new paragraph or places in the paper where you could use another source for support. I think of editing as hanging pictures in a room or putting on makeup: I have the solid walls or the clean face and now both need enhancing. I offer below some writing practices and ideas that you might consider as you revise and edit.

  • Epigraphs: you might want to think about including an epigraph as a way to invite the reader into the ideas of your paper. An epigraph is a quote (from an interview, from one of your sources, from a poem, a ply, a novel, a film…) that comes after your title and before the first paragraph. It is typically in italics and centered or flush right. See my quote above as an example.
  • Sources: check out Monica’s paper again and specifically notice how she introduces her quotes and how she cites her sources. You could also look at the example MLA paper on Purdue’s OWL. You might check your paper to see if you have articles in “quotes” and books or title of TV shows or films in italics. Did you use the author’s last name when referencing a quote? Did you cite page numbers correctly and is the period after the parenthesis (9).
  • Title: Is your title doing work for the reader? Can they tell what the draft is about? Is it engaging?
  • Word choice: are you getting the most out of your word choice? Is there a word that might say something more precisely?
  • Images: many of your papers lend themselves to including some images. You can insert an image into your google doc and even wrap the text around the image. Fancy.
  • Links: You might find that it makes sense to link to your source or to a video you are referencing. Think about all those links that were in the Audrey Waters’ article we read early this semester.
  • Bullet points: There might be places in your essay that would be more readable with bullet points.

Your final draft is due by the time you come to class on Monday, April 30. You can use the same google doc as your first draft. If you choose to make a new google doc, please make sure it is shared with your mentor and me.

*Important: Please include a memo that tells the mentor and I what you revised/edited and why you made those changes. If you chose to ignore some feedback, say why you decided not to include those ideas in your revision.

If you finish your revision/editing in the workshop, you might start to look over our resources and ideas for the multimodal project.

Happy revising everyone! You. Got. This.

 


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